![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
TITLE: A Thousand Glimpses
SERIES: All My Children
AUTHOR:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
dreiser
EMAIL: dreiser7@yahoo.com
YAHOO ID: dreiser7
MY WEBSITE: http://www.dreiser.org/
CONTENT: F/F romance. F/F sex. Bianca/Reese. Breeze.
SUMMARY: Reese Williams had experienced a thousand glimpses of the life she always wanted but until she met Bianca Montgomery she never thought she could have it for herself.
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but my fondness for my Reese and Miranda icon. Cuuuute!
AUTHOR'S NOTE: More sex. I won't write sex in every chapter and sometimes it will be little vignettes like it is here and sometimes it will be longer. Variety, you know? Anyway! I also have music again for those who like to indulge my nerdiness about such things. Both of these songs remind me of Reese in weird ways and thus I share them.
Out On A Limb by Heather Nova : Untie Me by Ani Lorak
A Thousand Glimpses
By: Dreiser
Sixteen
Ultimately, it was a lack of clean clothing that caused Reese to leave Bianca. Saying her goodbyes to Bianca and Miranda, she dawdled on the sidewalk, giving the brunette a kiss through the lowered car window. After which she promised to provide them both with a nice surprise for dinner that night. Walking inside her house, she took in the surroundings and it was like a visible reminder of her mother's rejection because everything around her, all the uncomfortable furniture, the decorations she despised and found ostentatious, they were her mother's choices.
This house had never felt like a home and Reese knew it was the fact that she had no connection to it. There were no good memories here, no happy times, and none of the little touches that reflected who she was as a person like her office did. Perhaps that's why Reese couldn't wait to leave this place, to gather up her clean clothes, packing up a larger number with greater variety and head over to Bianca's house. The other woman wanted her to come back, she had said so when Reese mentioned her need to return to her house, pausing once she said this to blush and remark that she understood if the blonde needed space.
Reese wiped away that suggestion with a passionate embrace, solid and strong, telling Bianca there was nowhere else she rather be than with her and Miranda. There was an utter truth to her words, a total belief, because why would she possibly need space from the one thing that made her feel good about herself? That gave her a genuine happiness? Bianca smiled at her, shy and sweet, and Reese thought her heart might burst from it, because seeing it made her so happy. To know that as much as she wanted to be with Bianca that was how much Bianca wanted to be with her. This was something new and wonderful for Reese to experience, having this certainty was amazing and it gave her a sense of calm.
It was this calm that Reese was sure was holding her together. Helping to remind her that no matter how much her parents rejection hurt in the end there was little she could do about it. She couldn't change who she was as a person, she couldn't force her parents to accept her, and she couldn't give up her relationship with Bianca. What she could do was move past that rejection, bury away that hurt, and focus on her future with the other woman and the family she clearly pictured herself having with Bianca and Miranda. Which is why she quickly gathered up her clothing and packed another travel bag then got inside her car, thinking of various restaurants she could get their dinner from.
Picking out a local seafood eatery, knowing Bianca's fondness for such food, Reese ordered the Gratinée de Coquille St. Jacques to go, sure that Miranda would enjoy it as well since the shrimp and scallops in the dish weren't in any sort of icky or natural looking state, therefore almost ensuring the child would eat it with minimal fuss. There was also the fact that Reese specifically bought some Apple Tarte Tatin for dessert which she was positive Miranda would love.
The choices for dinner and dessert were met with much enthusiasm by mother and daughter alike. While Miranda went about picking out a game for them to play, Bianca led Reese back to her bedroom. The brunette had that charming look on her face, the one that was bashful and tentative, and she almost rambled as she explained to Reese that she didn't want to presume but she did want it to be convenient for the blonde to spend the night whenever she felt like it. Reese was still baffling at the normally well spoken Bianca rambling when she was met with the sight of the brunette's walk in closet that had a very obvious empty space in it. Shelves had been cleared and a good portion of the rack had nothing but hangers on it and it was clearly meant to be filled with her things. She wasn't sure how long she stared at it when she heard Bianca say quietly that she didn't have to put her things in here if she didn't want to but she wanted to let Reese know it was there for her all the same.
Strange, it was so strange, crying because she was happy but it happened yet again and it was thanks to Bianca. The tears seemed to fall automatically and Reese knew Bianca was going to comfort her, she could tell by that look on her face, the one of infinite kindness but she didn't want that. So she drew Bianca to her in a fervent embrace, kissing her with a dedication that Reese never experienced with anyone else. They continued kissing until they heard a cough and they parted to look down at Miranda who was staring at them expectantly.
Miranda studied Reese for a long moment, her brow furrowing as she asked, "Is Reese sad?"
"No," Reese shook her head, laughing and rubbing her eyes with the heel of her hand. "I'm not sad at all."
"Why are you crying?" asked Miranda, her question innocent but concerned all the same.
"Sometimes people cry because they're happy," said Reese, kneeling down so she was eye level with the little girl. When Miranda looked skeptical on hearing this, she laughed again and said, "I know it seems silly but it's true. Just ask Mommy if you don't believe me."
Studying Reese, her brow still furrowed, Miranda shook her head then smiled as she said, "I believe you." She paused, biting her lip and looking so much like Bianca. "Why are you happy?"
Not confident in her response, Reese looked up at Bianca and the brunette smiled softly at her then moved down to kneel at Reese's side, reaching out to hold her daughter's hands. "Miranda," she murmured and immediately the child focused her attention onto Bianca. "Remember when we talked about how Mommy likes Reese?"
"You asked if I liked her too," said Miranda, her eyes alight as she recalled the conversation. She turned to Reese and leaned close to her, as if speaking a secret, and said, "I said yes."
"I'm glad," said Reese and she blinked, not wanting to cry again and worry the little girl.
"That made her cry?" asked Miranda, looking to Bianca, appearing perplexed.
"Well," said Bianca reluctantly and she had a thoughtful expression on her face. Turning to Reese, the blonde gave her an equally reassuring smile, one that Bianca returned before turning back to her daughter. "Like Reese said, she was crying happy tears and the reason why is I let her know how I want her to spend even more time with us by sleeping over like she did last night. How would you feel about that?"
Another pause and Miranda's gaze flicked from Bianca to Reese then back again. "Like Maggie?" she asked, looking contemplative. Bianca swallowed visibly and she hesitated, lost as to how to reply and Miranda fixed her attention onto Reese, her brown eyes big and worried as she said, "Reese won't go away too, will she?"
Seeing Bianca struggle with how to respond to this question, Reese took the child's hands in her own, smiling when Miranda looked her way. "I'm not going anywhere," said Reese firmly, her words reflecting the absolute truth of what she felt was in her heart because she didn't want to go anywhere. She wanted to stay with Bianca and Miranda as long as she was able, for the rest of her life if possible, and she was sure that Miranda could see this from the way her face broke out into a huge smile.
"Can we put together a puzzle?" asked Miranda hopefully.
"Sure," Reese replied, briefly looking to Bianca who had a closed off expression on her face and Reese suspected she was continuing to agonize over Miranda's comment about Maggie. Turning back to the little girl, Reese said, "Pick one out for us, all right?"
"Okay!" chirped Miranda, skipping out of the room, unaware of her mother's turmoil.
Soon as they were alone, Reese turned her attention to Bianca who snapped out of her daze and looked to her in something of a panic, her expression guilt ridden as she began, "I'm so sorry--"
"It's fine," interrupted Reese gently and she reached out to hold Bianca's hands, pulling the other woman to her feet. They stood across from one another and observing the brunette with a sympathetic smile on her face, Reese played with a lock of Bianca's dark hair, enjoying its silky texture between her fingertips. "I understand why she wanted to ask that. Maggie was close to her for some time and now I'm getting close to her too. She doesn't want me to leave the same way Maggie did and I imagine you feel similar, am I right?"
"You aren't Maggie," Bianca said this with an odd sort of ferocity, one that caused Reese to blink dimly.
"I know that," said Reese soft and serious. "And I know you do too. This is about making sure Miranda knows that. I don't want her to think I'm going to run off like things are over with when, to me, they've only just begun." A silly smile on her face, Reese moved closer, as if going in for a kiss, raising an eyebrow rakishly as she murmured, "And I just quoted The Carpenters."
Laughing and an affectionate light filling her dark gaze, Bianca tangled her fingers in Reese's blonde hair, drawing her near. "You're funny," she remarked before she kissed the architect slow and tender. Pulling away after several moments to regard Reese fondly, her hands caressing the small of the blonde's back as she said rather sardonically, "But you need better musical quotes."
"What's better than quoting The Carpenters?" asked Reese in humorous offense. "Elvis? Burning Love hardly suits the occasion." Bianca continued to laugh and Reese studied her closely, wondering if she really felt as carefree as she looked. "I meant what I said." When Bianca looked to her, surprised at the change in mood, Reese gave a smile but her voice and expression was solemn as she said, "I'm not going anywhere. For as long as you and Miranda want me around, I'll be here."
At first, Reese thought perhaps she had said too much, frightened Bianca with the depth of her feelings and the commitment she offered. Then the brunette smiled so bright and brilliant, holding Reese's face with her hands and kissing her hard and fast, with such an eagerness that it took Reese's breath away. When they separated, Bianca was still smiling, and she laughed, a quick and sudden burst that caused the blonde to laugh along, then she kissed Reese again, and they kept kissing until Miranda called out, proclaiming she had found the perfect puzzle.
Following Bianca into the living room where Miranda held up a puzzle for a fairy tale castle with large child sized pieces, Reese felt like she truly belonged. Like she was an important part of their lives and this was because of Bianca creating a space for her things along with Miranda's worries of Reese leaving. Somehow that worry, as sad as Reese found it, did provide ample proof of the child's attachment to her. As much as the idea of imitating her mother in how she treated Miranda, despite all her attempts not to, did frighten her, it made Reese feel so very good about herself to know that they both wanted her with them and were willing to show her this in an open and honest way.
After an hour of putting together the puzzle, it was Miranda's bedtime. Once story time was finished and the child was sound asleep, Reese found herself back in Bianca's bedroom. The two women laughing and joking as they unpacked Reese's clothing, putting them away in her newly claimed portion of the closet. When every last piece of clothing was in its place, Bianca tugged her into the bathroom, revealing an equally cleared area of the sink and Reese laughed again, saying that Bianca thought of everything while the other woman smiled and said she just wanted her to be comfortable.
No one had ever done something like this for Reese and it was slightly overwhelming, to have this much knowledge, this much evidence that Bianca really did care for her. She could see it in her actions and she could feel it in her kiss and she could hear it in her low moan as they made their way back to the bed. Everything was better with Bianca, every day her life seemed to improve in a manner that had Reese looking forward for the first time in years. Before she had always lived day by day, only looking forward in terms of her career, but never with her personal life. It seemed like she didn't have a future in terms of having a real romance until she met Bianca but now she had that future and it made her impossibly happy to know that. To know she finally had someone who knew her true self, the one she always kept hidden, and still cared enough to want her around, who wanted to share a life with her.
They fell back onto the bed, a tangle of limbs, still kissing deeply, and quickly stripping each other of their clothes. Soon they were naked, continuing to kiss, their embrace almost rushed and fevered in its intensity. Reese resting lightly on top of Bianca, kissing the brunette as she cupped full breasts in her hands, tweaking the nipples before pulling away, smiling at the other woman's noise of protest that turned into a moan as she sucked on one beautiful breast and then the other. Her hands sliding down, exploring Bianca's body, caressing her curves and smiling, euphoric and joyful, when she felt a soft pull and she was tugged upward, her lips met in a kiss that was as demanding as it was passionate.
"Inside you," Reese breathed shakily, her voice thick with desire when they parted, her breath hot on Bianca's skin, looking into dark eyes that saw so very much and always understood. "I want to be inside you."
"Yes," Bianca responded in a hush, leaning up to kiss Reese again, murmuring against her lips. "I want that too."
Sex was different with Bianca, it was special, there was no hesitation, no worries, it was a form of pure acceptance and somehow Reese knew whatever she did, whatever they did together, would be right, and it would be wonderful. Things she had done before, with other women, when she did them with Bianca they were better, more powerful, and Reese couldn't fathom it at times, to be able to feel this much with another person, but she did. She felt enough to gasp as her fingers slipped inside of the brunette, delighting in the texture and the warmth of the other woman, moaning as Bianca kissed her again while she started a slow thrusting motion and she played with Bianca's clit.
"Harder," Bianca gasped when they parted from their kiss.
Obeying the other woman's request, Reese's thrusts increased in strength and Bianca arched up off the bed, crying out as she reached for Reese, tangling her fingers in blonde hair and pulling her in for another kiss. They were kissing without inhibition as Bianca climaxed and they kept kissing as her body relaxed from the orgasm, sinking onto the bed, seeming to melt into the sheets, taking Reese with her. Bianca laughed, so happy and free, and she brought Reese in for another kiss, her hands warm and eager on Reese's body, making the architect moan as Bianca moved down, her lips insistent and enthusiastic as they led a trail of kisses downwards.
Instinctively her hips raised off the bed as she felt Bianca's tongue sweep into her and Reese squeezed her eyes shut, releasing a voiceless cry of pleasure when she felt the brunette suck on her clit. Bianca's hands were gentle and faint in their caress as they moved over her body and Reese ducked her head to one side, biting the sheet as Bianca's thumb began a rhythmic pattern over the blonde's clit. All this while Bianca's tongue moved inside her, tasting deeper than anyone else, creating sensations that Reese never experienced before and when she came, she did so with a shuddering sigh.
Bianca slid upwards, kissing her sweetly, and Reese smiled into her kiss as they fell backwards, lost in each other's embrace, their bodies a tangle of limbs with no space in between and somehow in this moment Reese knew that she was right. That this was just the beginning for them and she was so very pleased to know this and to be on this journey with Bianca.
---
The obnoxious beep of Bianca's alarm woke them in the morning and the brunette groaned in protest. Though she had just woke up herself, Reese couldn't help being amused by Bianca's grumbling and grouchy temperament. Moving close to the other woman and kissing her neck, she chuckled and looked at Bianca as she murmured, "You aren't a morning person, are you? Or do you really hate Mondays?"
"I like sleeping," Bianca said, her tones halfway whining. She shifted, moving into Reese's kisses and the blonde smiled against her skin, nuzzling the brunette's neck. Tugging Reese closer to her, Bianca kissed her, soft and gentle, and when they separated, she gave another groan, throwing her arm over her eyes as she mumbled, "I don't want to get up."
"Come on," encouraged Reese, moving the sheet off them and pulling Bianca into a sitting position, laughing when the brunette muttered a cantankerous complaint. "We can take a shower together before waking Miranda."
Raising an eyebrow and wearing an exaggerated expression of cynicism, Bianca remarked, "Why do I think this is less about waking me up and more about you wanting to get naked and wet with me?"
"I've already done that," Reese replied playfully, moving in for a kiss, and chuckling when Bianca rolled her eyes. "Is it so wrong I want to do it again in the shower? I think it could be fun."
"Fun," echoed Bianca humorously though she allowed Reese to move her off the bed and into the bathroom. She watched with a lidded gaze as Reese went over to the large walk in shower and turned on the water, waiting until it was at the perfect temperature before focusing her attention on the other woman. The architect held her hand out and Bianca shook her head and laughed, taking Reese's hand as she questioned, "How much fun?"
"Tons of fun," said Reese a bit mischievously.
Pressing against Bianca as they stood under the cascade of hot water, Reese chuckled when Bianca rolled her eyes yet again, kissing the brunette and moving her hands over the other woman's body that was already slippery from the water falling onto them. When they parted and she saw how beautiful Bianca looked, her dark hair wet from the water, she had the sudden urge to run her fingers through it. Reese focused on nearby bottles of shampoo and conditioner, and reaching for the bottles, she put a large dollop of both on the palm of her right hand then moved to stand behind Bianca, working her fingers into the dark hair, creating a nice lather. Murmuring for the brunette to close her eyes and tilt her head back once she felt it was lathered enough and when Bianca's hair was washed entirely, Reese pressed a kiss onto the other woman's shoulder, her arms slipping and sliding as they wrapped around the brunette's waist.
Her fingers were joined with Bianca's and they were led downwards and Reese gasped as she felt her fingers slip inside the brunette, the familiar warmth of Bianca surrounding her as they were moved in and out, guided by Bianca, making Reese feel so much closer to her because of this. Her other hand moved up, sliding across Bianca's wet skin, cupping the brunette's breast, squeezing it gently and playing with a stiffening nipple as she kissed the line of Bianca's neck, taking in her shivers and moans as the brunette approached orgasm. Bianca moaned as she came, shivering regardless of the hot water, laughing as she turned in Reese's arms, tangling her fingers in the blonde's wet hair.
"You're right," Bianca smiled, her lips warm against Reese's, kissing her tenderly. "That was tons of fun but I think it might have been more fun for me than you." As she said this, Bianca gently pushed Reese forward until she was leaning against the shower wall, the tiles cool against Reese's skin. The architect was about to protest Bianca's assessment when the other woman pressed her index finger against her lips, halting the words as she murmured, "Now it's your turn."
Removing her finger and replacing it with her lips, Bianca kissed Reese slowly, tasting from the blonde deeply, learning everything she had to offer. The kiss left Reese breathless and quivering and she was shaking as Bianca's hands caressed her body, sliding over her wet skin, and Bianca continued to kiss her as her hands moved down, fingers playing at the outside of Reese's pussy. Bianca kept kissing her, careful and focused, each kiss more loving than the last and Reese whimpered when she finally felt the brunette's fingers move inside her, the pace steady and measured, and she arched into Bianca's touch, thrusting her hips outwards, wanting Bianca to go further inside of her, needing her to be deeper, to go as far as she could because in this moment Reese needed that, for them to be as close as possible, and she clung to Bianca.
There was such feeling from every little thing, the water falling down on them, heating her skin, Bianca's lips, full and pliant against her own, the hand sliding down her back, cupping her buttocks, lifting her up, the brunette's fingers moving deeper inside her, each thrust more powerful than the last, and the thumb pressing down on her clit in a circular caress. It was all so much, each new time was better than the previous and Reese climaxed with a cry, making noise for the first time during sex and she could sense the tears falling from her eyes, and she felt Bianca's lips on her face, kissing those tears away as she trembled in her arms.
Unhurried and luxuriant in their caresses, they cleaned one another, walking out of the shower a half an hour later to dress and wake Miranda who Reese was amused to see was just as grumpy as Bianca in the morning. After eating breakfast together, they got the child ready for school with Nathan as an intimidating figure lurking about the house. His presence was less startling to Reese when she caught him sneaking some candy into Miranda's backpack, his explanation being that it would help to cheer the little girl up. She parted with Bianca and Miranda, giving a kiss to the former and a hug to the latter, and walked to her building on Avenue Secretan, greeting Danielle on her way up to her office.
Nonstop meetings, sketching, and improving designs consumed her for most the day and she only stopped working late in the afternoon, just after two o'clock, when Audrey arrived in her office with a bag smelling distinctly of marinated potatoes, lamb, and beef. "Baeckeoffe from your favorite café," Audrey informed, putting the bag down and removing two small containers, handing one to Reese along with a plastic fork as she settled in the chair across from Reese's desk. They ate in relative silence for several minutes then the redhead studied Reese with an astute gaze as she said, "The trip did not go well."
Finishing her bite of baeckeoffe, Reese chewed her food deliberately slow, trying her best to think of how to word things in such a way that her friend wouldn't become upset but she realized, in the end, any attempt would be impossible. That's why she just gave in and told the truth, knowing that unlike with Bianca, she had nothing to lose with Audrey. "No," she said with a wry humor, placing the container down on her desk and leaning back in her chair. "It went horribly, in fact."
"Your mother?" said Audrey knowingly.
"She said Bianca had influenced me after the trauma of the break up with Simon," Reese said, her voice dripping with disdain and she smirked upon hearing the bark of laughter Audrey released in response. "Dad," Reese trailed off, her eyes tearing up when she thought of her father's confused expression and the hug he gave her as she left the house.
"He believed your mother's accusations?" asked Audrey with some surprise.
"No, not that," said Reese, shaking her head, turning her chair from Audrey and looking down the street towards Bianca's house, blinking back her tears. "He didn't understand though and I think he was hurt by it because we've always been able to understand each other even if we couldn't understand Mother." Spinning slightly in her chair, she said in guilt ridden tones, "I didn't tell Bianca the reason I went to New York."
"Why?" Audrey questioned and she sounded sincerely confused.
"Fear of losing her, I don't know," said Reese in self-deprecating tones, rubbing at her eyes. "We've just started this relationship and it's dumping a lot on Bianca, to let her know my parents rejected me because I've come out of the closet and told them about my feelings for her. What if she decides it's too much to deal with?" She looked to Audrey with a plaintive and pleading gaze. "I know things are new between us and I've only been seeing her for over a month but I care for her so much, Audrey. For her and for Miranda and as crazy as it sounds I feel like they're my new family and if I lost them too, right after what happened with my parents…" Shaking her head, Reese muttered, "I couldn't take it."
"You do intend to eventually tell her the truth?" pursued Audrey. When Reese avoided her gaze, she frowned severely and she said, "I do not think that is the wisest path. She deserves to know this, don't you agree?"
"Deserves to know my mother blames her for me being a lesbian? Deserves to know they rejected me the moment they found out I was a lesbian and was involved with her? I don't think anyone deserves to know things like that, things that hurt that much," said Reese hotly, her voice sharp and not brooking any arguments. "No," Reese said resolutely and her gaze was flinty as she focused on the redhead. "What happened in New York? My parents? They don't matter anymore. That's the past. Bianca and Miranda are my future and I'm not going to let that get ruined by their prejudice. I refuse to let that happen, Audrey."
"I did not say that it should. I merely think that Bianca should know the truth," said Audrey, her frown remaining. "Reese," she murmured in tones far too reasonable for her usual brash attitude. "This will not end well. You keeping these secrets from her."
"It doesn't matter," said Reese stubbornly as if convinced the more she said it, the more she thought it, the truer it would become until it wouldn't matter at all that she lost her relationship with her parents by simply revealing who she really was.
Instead of replying, Audrey continued to look at her in mild disbelief, and Reese went back to eating her baeckeoffe. Telling herself that no matter what her business partner thought, she was correct in her decision, no matter how miserable it made her feel.
To be continued...
SERIES: All My Children
AUTHOR:
dreiserEMAIL: dreiser7@yahoo.com
YAHOO ID: dreiser7
MY WEBSITE: http://www.dreiser.org/
CONTENT: F/F romance. F/F sex. Bianca/Reese. Breeze.
SUMMARY: Reese Williams had experienced a thousand glimpses of the life she always wanted but until she met Bianca Montgomery she never thought she could have it for herself.
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but my fondness for my Reese and Miranda icon. Cuuuute!
AUTHOR'S NOTE: More sex. I won't write sex in every chapter and sometimes it will be little vignettes like it is here and sometimes it will be longer. Variety, you know? Anyway! I also have music again for those who like to indulge my nerdiness about such things. Both of these songs remind me of Reese in weird ways and thus I share them.
Out On A Limb by Heather Nova : Untie Me by Ani Lorak
A Thousand Glimpses
By: Dreiser
Sixteen
Ultimately, it was a lack of clean clothing that caused Reese to leave Bianca. Saying her goodbyes to Bianca and Miranda, she dawdled on the sidewalk, giving the brunette a kiss through the lowered car window. After which she promised to provide them both with a nice surprise for dinner that night. Walking inside her house, she took in the surroundings and it was like a visible reminder of her mother's rejection because everything around her, all the uncomfortable furniture, the decorations she despised and found ostentatious, they were her mother's choices.
This house had never felt like a home and Reese knew it was the fact that she had no connection to it. There were no good memories here, no happy times, and none of the little touches that reflected who she was as a person like her office did. Perhaps that's why Reese couldn't wait to leave this place, to gather up her clean clothes, packing up a larger number with greater variety and head over to Bianca's house. The other woman wanted her to come back, she had said so when Reese mentioned her need to return to her house, pausing once she said this to blush and remark that she understood if the blonde needed space.
Reese wiped away that suggestion with a passionate embrace, solid and strong, telling Bianca there was nowhere else she rather be than with her and Miranda. There was an utter truth to her words, a total belief, because why would she possibly need space from the one thing that made her feel good about herself? That gave her a genuine happiness? Bianca smiled at her, shy and sweet, and Reese thought her heart might burst from it, because seeing it made her so happy. To know that as much as she wanted to be with Bianca that was how much Bianca wanted to be with her. This was something new and wonderful for Reese to experience, having this certainty was amazing and it gave her a sense of calm.
It was this calm that Reese was sure was holding her together. Helping to remind her that no matter how much her parents rejection hurt in the end there was little she could do about it. She couldn't change who she was as a person, she couldn't force her parents to accept her, and she couldn't give up her relationship with Bianca. What she could do was move past that rejection, bury away that hurt, and focus on her future with the other woman and the family she clearly pictured herself having with Bianca and Miranda. Which is why she quickly gathered up her clothing and packed another travel bag then got inside her car, thinking of various restaurants she could get their dinner from.
Picking out a local seafood eatery, knowing Bianca's fondness for such food, Reese ordered the Gratinée de Coquille St. Jacques to go, sure that Miranda would enjoy it as well since the shrimp and scallops in the dish weren't in any sort of icky or natural looking state, therefore almost ensuring the child would eat it with minimal fuss. There was also the fact that Reese specifically bought some Apple Tarte Tatin for dessert which she was positive Miranda would love.
The choices for dinner and dessert were met with much enthusiasm by mother and daughter alike. While Miranda went about picking out a game for them to play, Bianca led Reese back to her bedroom. The brunette had that charming look on her face, the one that was bashful and tentative, and she almost rambled as she explained to Reese that she didn't want to presume but she did want it to be convenient for the blonde to spend the night whenever she felt like it. Reese was still baffling at the normally well spoken Bianca rambling when she was met with the sight of the brunette's walk in closet that had a very obvious empty space in it. Shelves had been cleared and a good portion of the rack had nothing but hangers on it and it was clearly meant to be filled with her things. She wasn't sure how long she stared at it when she heard Bianca say quietly that she didn't have to put her things in here if she didn't want to but she wanted to let Reese know it was there for her all the same.
Strange, it was so strange, crying because she was happy but it happened yet again and it was thanks to Bianca. The tears seemed to fall automatically and Reese knew Bianca was going to comfort her, she could tell by that look on her face, the one of infinite kindness but she didn't want that. So she drew Bianca to her in a fervent embrace, kissing her with a dedication that Reese never experienced with anyone else. They continued kissing until they heard a cough and they parted to look down at Miranda who was staring at them expectantly.
Miranda studied Reese for a long moment, her brow furrowing as she asked, "Is Reese sad?"
"No," Reese shook her head, laughing and rubbing her eyes with the heel of her hand. "I'm not sad at all."
"Why are you crying?" asked Miranda, her question innocent but concerned all the same.
"Sometimes people cry because they're happy," said Reese, kneeling down so she was eye level with the little girl. When Miranda looked skeptical on hearing this, she laughed again and said, "I know it seems silly but it's true. Just ask Mommy if you don't believe me."
Studying Reese, her brow still furrowed, Miranda shook her head then smiled as she said, "I believe you." She paused, biting her lip and looking so much like Bianca. "Why are you happy?"
Not confident in her response, Reese looked up at Bianca and the brunette smiled softly at her then moved down to kneel at Reese's side, reaching out to hold her daughter's hands. "Miranda," she murmured and immediately the child focused her attention onto Bianca. "Remember when we talked about how Mommy likes Reese?"
"You asked if I liked her too," said Miranda, her eyes alight as she recalled the conversation. She turned to Reese and leaned close to her, as if speaking a secret, and said, "I said yes."
"I'm glad," said Reese and she blinked, not wanting to cry again and worry the little girl.
"That made her cry?" asked Miranda, looking to Bianca, appearing perplexed.
"Well," said Bianca reluctantly and she had a thoughtful expression on her face. Turning to Reese, the blonde gave her an equally reassuring smile, one that Bianca returned before turning back to her daughter. "Like Reese said, she was crying happy tears and the reason why is I let her know how I want her to spend even more time with us by sleeping over like she did last night. How would you feel about that?"
Another pause and Miranda's gaze flicked from Bianca to Reese then back again. "Like Maggie?" she asked, looking contemplative. Bianca swallowed visibly and she hesitated, lost as to how to reply and Miranda fixed her attention onto Reese, her brown eyes big and worried as she said, "Reese won't go away too, will she?"
Seeing Bianca struggle with how to respond to this question, Reese took the child's hands in her own, smiling when Miranda looked her way. "I'm not going anywhere," said Reese firmly, her words reflecting the absolute truth of what she felt was in her heart because she didn't want to go anywhere. She wanted to stay with Bianca and Miranda as long as she was able, for the rest of her life if possible, and she was sure that Miranda could see this from the way her face broke out into a huge smile.
"Can we put together a puzzle?" asked Miranda hopefully.
"Sure," Reese replied, briefly looking to Bianca who had a closed off expression on her face and Reese suspected she was continuing to agonize over Miranda's comment about Maggie. Turning back to the little girl, Reese said, "Pick one out for us, all right?"
"Okay!" chirped Miranda, skipping out of the room, unaware of her mother's turmoil.
Soon as they were alone, Reese turned her attention to Bianca who snapped out of her daze and looked to her in something of a panic, her expression guilt ridden as she began, "I'm so sorry--"
"It's fine," interrupted Reese gently and she reached out to hold Bianca's hands, pulling the other woman to her feet. They stood across from one another and observing the brunette with a sympathetic smile on her face, Reese played with a lock of Bianca's dark hair, enjoying its silky texture between her fingertips. "I understand why she wanted to ask that. Maggie was close to her for some time and now I'm getting close to her too. She doesn't want me to leave the same way Maggie did and I imagine you feel similar, am I right?"
"You aren't Maggie," Bianca said this with an odd sort of ferocity, one that caused Reese to blink dimly.
"I know that," said Reese soft and serious. "And I know you do too. This is about making sure Miranda knows that. I don't want her to think I'm going to run off like things are over with when, to me, they've only just begun." A silly smile on her face, Reese moved closer, as if going in for a kiss, raising an eyebrow rakishly as she murmured, "And I just quoted The Carpenters."
Laughing and an affectionate light filling her dark gaze, Bianca tangled her fingers in Reese's blonde hair, drawing her near. "You're funny," she remarked before she kissed the architect slow and tender. Pulling away after several moments to regard Reese fondly, her hands caressing the small of the blonde's back as she said rather sardonically, "But you need better musical quotes."
"What's better than quoting The Carpenters?" asked Reese in humorous offense. "Elvis? Burning Love hardly suits the occasion." Bianca continued to laugh and Reese studied her closely, wondering if she really felt as carefree as she looked. "I meant what I said." When Bianca looked to her, surprised at the change in mood, Reese gave a smile but her voice and expression was solemn as she said, "I'm not going anywhere. For as long as you and Miranda want me around, I'll be here."
At first, Reese thought perhaps she had said too much, frightened Bianca with the depth of her feelings and the commitment she offered. Then the brunette smiled so bright and brilliant, holding Reese's face with her hands and kissing her hard and fast, with such an eagerness that it took Reese's breath away. When they separated, Bianca was still smiling, and she laughed, a quick and sudden burst that caused the blonde to laugh along, then she kissed Reese again, and they kept kissing until Miranda called out, proclaiming she had found the perfect puzzle.
Following Bianca into the living room where Miranda held up a puzzle for a fairy tale castle with large child sized pieces, Reese felt like she truly belonged. Like she was an important part of their lives and this was because of Bianca creating a space for her things along with Miranda's worries of Reese leaving. Somehow that worry, as sad as Reese found it, did provide ample proof of the child's attachment to her. As much as the idea of imitating her mother in how she treated Miranda, despite all her attempts not to, did frighten her, it made Reese feel so very good about herself to know that they both wanted her with them and were willing to show her this in an open and honest way.
After an hour of putting together the puzzle, it was Miranda's bedtime. Once story time was finished and the child was sound asleep, Reese found herself back in Bianca's bedroom. The two women laughing and joking as they unpacked Reese's clothing, putting them away in her newly claimed portion of the closet. When every last piece of clothing was in its place, Bianca tugged her into the bathroom, revealing an equally cleared area of the sink and Reese laughed again, saying that Bianca thought of everything while the other woman smiled and said she just wanted her to be comfortable.
No one had ever done something like this for Reese and it was slightly overwhelming, to have this much knowledge, this much evidence that Bianca really did care for her. She could see it in her actions and she could feel it in her kiss and she could hear it in her low moan as they made their way back to the bed. Everything was better with Bianca, every day her life seemed to improve in a manner that had Reese looking forward for the first time in years. Before she had always lived day by day, only looking forward in terms of her career, but never with her personal life. It seemed like she didn't have a future in terms of having a real romance until she met Bianca but now she had that future and it made her impossibly happy to know that. To know she finally had someone who knew her true self, the one she always kept hidden, and still cared enough to want her around, who wanted to share a life with her.
They fell back onto the bed, a tangle of limbs, still kissing deeply, and quickly stripping each other of their clothes. Soon they were naked, continuing to kiss, their embrace almost rushed and fevered in its intensity. Reese resting lightly on top of Bianca, kissing the brunette as she cupped full breasts in her hands, tweaking the nipples before pulling away, smiling at the other woman's noise of protest that turned into a moan as she sucked on one beautiful breast and then the other. Her hands sliding down, exploring Bianca's body, caressing her curves and smiling, euphoric and joyful, when she felt a soft pull and she was tugged upward, her lips met in a kiss that was as demanding as it was passionate.
"Inside you," Reese breathed shakily, her voice thick with desire when they parted, her breath hot on Bianca's skin, looking into dark eyes that saw so very much and always understood. "I want to be inside you."
"Yes," Bianca responded in a hush, leaning up to kiss Reese again, murmuring against her lips. "I want that too."
Sex was different with Bianca, it was special, there was no hesitation, no worries, it was a form of pure acceptance and somehow Reese knew whatever she did, whatever they did together, would be right, and it would be wonderful. Things she had done before, with other women, when she did them with Bianca they were better, more powerful, and Reese couldn't fathom it at times, to be able to feel this much with another person, but she did. She felt enough to gasp as her fingers slipped inside of the brunette, delighting in the texture and the warmth of the other woman, moaning as Bianca kissed her again while she started a slow thrusting motion and she played with Bianca's clit.
"Harder," Bianca gasped when they parted from their kiss.
Obeying the other woman's request, Reese's thrusts increased in strength and Bianca arched up off the bed, crying out as she reached for Reese, tangling her fingers in blonde hair and pulling her in for another kiss. They were kissing without inhibition as Bianca climaxed and they kept kissing as her body relaxed from the orgasm, sinking onto the bed, seeming to melt into the sheets, taking Reese with her. Bianca laughed, so happy and free, and she brought Reese in for another kiss, her hands warm and eager on Reese's body, making the architect moan as Bianca moved down, her lips insistent and enthusiastic as they led a trail of kisses downwards.
Instinctively her hips raised off the bed as she felt Bianca's tongue sweep into her and Reese squeezed her eyes shut, releasing a voiceless cry of pleasure when she felt the brunette suck on her clit. Bianca's hands were gentle and faint in their caress as they moved over her body and Reese ducked her head to one side, biting the sheet as Bianca's thumb began a rhythmic pattern over the blonde's clit. All this while Bianca's tongue moved inside her, tasting deeper than anyone else, creating sensations that Reese never experienced before and when she came, she did so with a shuddering sigh.
Bianca slid upwards, kissing her sweetly, and Reese smiled into her kiss as they fell backwards, lost in each other's embrace, their bodies a tangle of limbs with no space in between and somehow in this moment Reese knew that she was right. That this was just the beginning for them and she was so very pleased to know this and to be on this journey with Bianca.
---
The obnoxious beep of Bianca's alarm woke them in the morning and the brunette groaned in protest. Though she had just woke up herself, Reese couldn't help being amused by Bianca's grumbling and grouchy temperament. Moving close to the other woman and kissing her neck, she chuckled and looked at Bianca as she murmured, "You aren't a morning person, are you? Or do you really hate Mondays?"
"I like sleeping," Bianca said, her tones halfway whining. She shifted, moving into Reese's kisses and the blonde smiled against her skin, nuzzling the brunette's neck. Tugging Reese closer to her, Bianca kissed her, soft and gentle, and when they separated, she gave another groan, throwing her arm over her eyes as she mumbled, "I don't want to get up."
"Come on," encouraged Reese, moving the sheet off them and pulling Bianca into a sitting position, laughing when the brunette muttered a cantankerous complaint. "We can take a shower together before waking Miranda."
Raising an eyebrow and wearing an exaggerated expression of cynicism, Bianca remarked, "Why do I think this is less about waking me up and more about you wanting to get naked and wet with me?"
"I've already done that," Reese replied playfully, moving in for a kiss, and chuckling when Bianca rolled her eyes. "Is it so wrong I want to do it again in the shower? I think it could be fun."
"Fun," echoed Bianca humorously though she allowed Reese to move her off the bed and into the bathroom. She watched with a lidded gaze as Reese went over to the large walk in shower and turned on the water, waiting until it was at the perfect temperature before focusing her attention on the other woman. The architect held her hand out and Bianca shook her head and laughed, taking Reese's hand as she questioned, "How much fun?"
"Tons of fun," said Reese a bit mischievously.
Pressing against Bianca as they stood under the cascade of hot water, Reese chuckled when Bianca rolled her eyes yet again, kissing the brunette and moving her hands over the other woman's body that was already slippery from the water falling onto them. When they parted and she saw how beautiful Bianca looked, her dark hair wet from the water, she had the sudden urge to run her fingers through it. Reese focused on nearby bottles of shampoo and conditioner, and reaching for the bottles, she put a large dollop of both on the palm of her right hand then moved to stand behind Bianca, working her fingers into the dark hair, creating a nice lather. Murmuring for the brunette to close her eyes and tilt her head back once she felt it was lathered enough and when Bianca's hair was washed entirely, Reese pressed a kiss onto the other woman's shoulder, her arms slipping and sliding as they wrapped around the brunette's waist.
Her fingers were joined with Bianca's and they were led downwards and Reese gasped as she felt her fingers slip inside the brunette, the familiar warmth of Bianca surrounding her as they were moved in and out, guided by Bianca, making Reese feel so much closer to her because of this. Her other hand moved up, sliding across Bianca's wet skin, cupping the brunette's breast, squeezing it gently and playing with a stiffening nipple as she kissed the line of Bianca's neck, taking in her shivers and moans as the brunette approached orgasm. Bianca moaned as she came, shivering regardless of the hot water, laughing as she turned in Reese's arms, tangling her fingers in the blonde's wet hair.
"You're right," Bianca smiled, her lips warm against Reese's, kissing her tenderly. "That was tons of fun but I think it might have been more fun for me than you." As she said this, Bianca gently pushed Reese forward until she was leaning against the shower wall, the tiles cool against Reese's skin. The architect was about to protest Bianca's assessment when the other woman pressed her index finger against her lips, halting the words as she murmured, "Now it's your turn."
Removing her finger and replacing it with her lips, Bianca kissed Reese slowly, tasting from the blonde deeply, learning everything she had to offer. The kiss left Reese breathless and quivering and she was shaking as Bianca's hands caressed her body, sliding over her wet skin, and Bianca continued to kiss her as her hands moved down, fingers playing at the outside of Reese's pussy. Bianca kept kissing her, careful and focused, each kiss more loving than the last and Reese whimpered when she finally felt the brunette's fingers move inside her, the pace steady and measured, and she arched into Bianca's touch, thrusting her hips outwards, wanting Bianca to go further inside of her, needing her to be deeper, to go as far as she could because in this moment Reese needed that, for them to be as close as possible, and she clung to Bianca.
There was such feeling from every little thing, the water falling down on them, heating her skin, Bianca's lips, full and pliant against her own, the hand sliding down her back, cupping her buttocks, lifting her up, the brunette's fingers moving deeper inside her, each thrust more powerful than the last, and the thumb pressing down on her clit in a circular caress. It was all so much, each new time was better than the previous and Reese climaxed with a cry, making noise for the first time during sex and she could sense the tears falling from her eyes, and she felt Bianca's lips on her face, kissing those tears away as she trembled in her arms.
Unhurried and luxuriant in their caresses, they cleaned one another, walking out of the shower a half an hour later to dress and wake Miranda who Reese was amused to see was just as grumpy as Bianca in the morning. After eating breakfast together, they got the child ready for school with Nathan as an intimidating figure lurking about the house. His presence was less startling to Reese when she caught him sneaking some candy into Miranda's backpack, his explanation being that it would help to cheer the little girl up. She parted with Bianca and Miranda, giving a kiss to the former and a hug to the latter, and walked to her building on Avenue Secretan, greeting Danielle on her way up to her office.
Nonstop meetings, sketching, and improving designs consumed her for most the day and she only stopped working late in the afternoon, just after two o'clock, when Audrey arrived in her office with a bag smelling distinctly of marinated potatoes, lamb, and beef. "Baeckeoffe from your favorite café," Audrey informed, putting the bag down and removing two small containers, handing one to Reese along with a plastic fork as she settled in the chair across from Reese's desk. They ate in relative silence for several minutes then the redhead studied Reese with an astute gaze as she said, "The trip did not go well."
Finishing her bite of baeckeoffe, Reese chewed her food deliberately slow, trying her best to think of how to word things in such a way that her friend wouldn't become upset but she realized, in the end, any attempt would be impossible. That's why she just gave in and told the truth, knowing that unlike with Bianca, she had nothing to lose with Audrey. "No," she said with a wry humor, placing the container down on her desk and leaning back in her chair. "It went horribly, in fact."
"Your mother?" said Audrey knowingly.
"She said Bianca had influenced me after the trauma of the break up with Simon," Reese said, her voice dripping with disdain and she smirked upon hearing the bark of laughter Audrey released in response. "Dad," Reese trailed off, her eyes tearing up when she thought of her father's confused expression and the hug he gave her as she left the house.
"He believed your mother's accusations?" asked Audrey with some surprise.
"No, not that," said Reese, shaking her head, turning her chair from Audrey and looking down the street towards Bianca's house, blinking back her tears. "He didn't understand though and I think he was hurt by it because we've always been able to understand each other even if we couldn't understand Mother." Spinning slightly in her chair, she said in guilt ridden tones, "I didn't tell Bianca the reason I went to New York."
"Why?" Audrey questioned and she sounded sincerely confused.
"Fear of losing her, I don't know," said Reese in self-deprecating tones, rubbing at her eyes. "We've just started this relationship and it's dumping a lot on Bianca, to let her know my parents rejected me because I've come out of the closet and told them about my feelings for her. What if she decides it's too much to deal with?" She looked to Audrey with a plaintive and pleading gaze. "I know things are new between us and I've only been seeing her for over a month but I care for her so much, Audrey. For her and for Miranda and as crazy as it sounds I feel like they're my new family and if I lost them too, right after what happened with my parents…" Shaking her head, Reese muttered, "I couldn't take it."
"You do intend to eventually tell her the truth?" pursued Audrey. When Reese avoided her gaze, she frowned severely and she said, "I do not think that is the wisest path. She deserves to know this, don't you agree?"
"Deserves to know my mother blames her for me being a lesbian? Deserves to know they rejected me the moment they found out I was a lesbian and was involved with her? I don't think anyone deserves to know things like that, things that hurt that much," said Reese hotly, her voice sharp and not brooking any arguments. "No," Reese said resolutely and her gaze was flinty as she focused on the redhead. "What happened in New York? My parents? They don't matter anymore. That's the past. Bianca and Miranda are my future and I'm not going to let that get ruined by their prejudice. I refuse to let that happen, Audrey."
"I did not say that it should. I merely think that Bianca should know the truth," said Audrey, her frown remaining. "Reese," she murmured in tones far too reasonable for her usual brash attitude. "This will not end well. You keeping these secrets from her."
"It doesn't matter," said Reese stubbornly as if convinced the more she said it, the more she thought it, the truer it would become until it wouldn't matter at all that she lost her relationship with her parents by simply revealing who she really was.
Instead of replying, Audrey continued to look at her in mild disbelief, and Reese went back to eating her baeckeoffe. Telling herself that no matter what her business partner thought, she was correct in her decision, no matter how miserable it made her feel.
To be continued...
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