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Helacious fic. Huzzah or something.
TITLE: Time Will Tell
SERIES: The L Word
AUTHOR: Dreiser
EMAIL: dreiser7@yahoo.com
YAHOO ID: dreiser7
MY WEBSITE: http://www.dreiser.net/
CONTENT: S3 spoilers. F/F romance. Alice/Helena. Helacious.
SUMMARY: Even years of separation can't take away the connection between Alice and Helena and the attraction they feel for one another.
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but my undying Helacious love.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: The idea for this fic and the title comes from a spiffy song from Anberlin.
The song they dance to is That's All I Need by Heather Nova which is super sexy but sad. Which is something Heather does so well. But she also does happy and pretty very well so here's another song by her that is precisely that: Singing You Through by Heather Nova.
Time Will Tell
By: Dreiser
Scene Seven
The drive to the club was silent. Mostly because Alice felt the best way to control her impulse to question Helena's driver about her was to simply not to speak to him. Unfortunately, this also meant the drive was horrifically boring.
When they finally reached the club, Alice's hand was on the door and she was exiting the car before it came to a complete stop. "Thanks!" she exclaimed, deciding it was safe to say that much at least. Still, she didn't entirely trust herself and so she called this over her shoulder while bounding forward into the club.
But the moment she stepped inside, Alice found herself motionless as she became entranced by her surroundings. With low tinted lights, luxurious leather lounges, high tables, a long u-shaped bar, and slow sensual music filling the air, this was nothing like any club Alice frequented on a regular basis. Not that she frequented any club other than The Planet since she turned forty. She had declared more than once on the air that anyone over forty involved in the club scene was a sad matter that required an immediate intervention.
This club though, Alice had to admit it suited Helena. It was soothing and rich its atmosphere. Helena fit here.
Alice didn't.
"I thought you would never arrive, darling," Helena murmured in her ear, breath warm on Alice's skin and her voice gently teasing. "Whatever kept you?"
"Your slow driver," replied Alice sardonically, smiling as Helena chuckled at her response. It was nice to see Helena in a better mood or at least an outwardly less hostile one.
"I shall tell him to speed next time," said Helena. She tilted her head and wore a soft look on her features. "Should we sit?"
"Sitting would be good," said Alice, nodding out of sheer nervousness and following after Helena. "I'm feeling a little like Dorothy." When Helena look at her questioningly, Alice laughed and said, "I don't think I'm in West Hollywood anymore!"
Chuckling again, Helena lightly grasped Alice's hand, leading her towards the booth that had somehow become labeled as exclusively hers over the years. Perhaps the fifty percent tips had something to do with it but Helena couldn't be sure. "Ever so clever," she said, sounding pleased to acknowledge this.
"I try," said Alice, still feeling nervous and not quite knowing why.
Perhaps because for the first time since they had become friends the blonde didn't have any idea what Helena was thinking, much less feeling. Something that was terribly disconcerting when she thought of their former bond. That was the thing though. It was former. As in the past and if she was going to get anywhere, Alice had to get beyond her thoughts of how things had been and live in the present. Even if the present wasn't nearly as comfortable as the past.
Focusing ahead, Alice stared at the booth which was shaped in a half circle and had comfortable leather seats that your body easily sank into. Clearly it was designed for intimate encounters and holding this knowledge foremost in her mind, Alice stood unmoving, a picture of trepidation as she looked at it.
Seeing Alice's hesitation, Helena laid a gentle hand to the small of her back, encouraging her forward. "It's all right," her voice, light but reassuring sounded in Alice's ear. "I think it a safe enough venture for us to sit side by side. We aren't virginal teenagers in the fifties so there shant be any arrests for disreputable behavior."
Relaxing immediately, Alice grinned at the British woman and drawled, "Are you promising not to get me in the family way?"
"I rather think that impossible but yes, I do promise," Helena laughed warmly, pulling Alice into the booth after her.
"Rather or impossible?" pursued Alice mischievously.
"Both," pronounced Helena, smiling as she tapped Alice on the tip of her nose. "Scamp."
"Isn't that a character in a Disney movie?" asked Alice, frowning and wiggling her suddenly itchy nose. For some odd reason anytime someone touched her nose it itched afterwards.
"Tramp is the character's name," said Helena, looking at Alice expectantly. When Alice stared at her blankly, Helena shook her head and said, "From Lady and The Tramp?" When Alice continued to stare at her blankly, Helena chuckled then offered sardonically, "Orphaned Romeo & Juliet dogs dining on sympathy spaghetti."
"Ohh!" Alice cried, clapping her hands excitedly. "Dogs kissing," she said, appearing utterly scandalized. "Disney gone naughty."
"I'm sure Hilary Duff is far more responsible for that," replied Helena, smiling as she turned to greet her usual server. "Meredith," Helena drew her name out slow like honey. "How are you this evening?"
"Glad to see you," Meredith said, smiling widely and leaning in closer. She put her hand to the side of her mouth and said in a faux confession to Helena and Alice, "The lady at table three in the strapless red monstrosity will not leave me be. It's driving me mad, honestly it is." Forming an overly lecherous expression and changing her voice, Meredith continued, "You look like you could use a bit of color. Fancy a trip with me to my home in Saint Tropez?" Releasing a disgusted snort, the server stood to her full height and waved her hands about in agitation. "As if I'd jump into her bed and private jet just because I'm lucky enough to get the offer." Shaking her head and pulling her order notebook from her skirt, Meredith muttered, "I despise wealthy women. Large tips do not make me into your slave woman." She peered at Helena, waiting for her order. When Helena raised an eyebrow in amusement, Meredith rolled her eyes and huffed as she waved her notebook about, "Not you! Would I complain to you if I meant you?"
"I should hope not," Helena chuckled.
"You," Meredith announced, pointing her notebook at Helena. "Are the only wealthy customer to not thrust herself upon me. Thus, you are the only one I would surely not mind if she did so." Giving a saucy smile, she drawled, "Was that part of your ingenious plan, Ms. Peabody?"
"Certainly not," said Helena in chiding tones, looking rather like she was scolding one of her children. "I was merely being polite."
"A polite lady does win her way to my heart," mused Meredith, wearing a thoughtful expression. Shaking out of this temporary respite, she then said, "Now whatever will you be imbibing this fine evening?"
"Bloody Mary," said Helena, turning to Alice with a smile. "And you, darling?"
"Beer, please. Any porter will do," said Alice, moving forward and grinning at Meredith. The server's easy attitude with Helena had relaxed the atmosphere greatly and she was extremely grateful to her as a result. "Surprise me."
"Lovely!" Meredith exclaimed, giving Alice a wink. "I adore surprising gorgeous women. It's my favorite pastime."
That said, Meredith turned on her heel and practically skipped over to the bar. Laughing softly, Alice looked to Helena and said, "She's fun."
"She's a horrid flirt," said Helena dryly though her voice was laced with affection. "But she is a terribly sweet girl."
"Girl?" inquired Alice, lifting an eyebrow. Tilting her head to get a better look at the curvaceous Meredith who was laughing gaily at whatever the bartending was saying, Alice wore a skeptical expression. "She looks like a woman to me."
"She is barely twenty one," Helena informed primly. Wagging her index finger side to side and a mischievous light emerging in her eyes, she said, "I consider it wicked indeed to engage in romantic activities with those five years within the age of my children. Not to mention it is substantially ill advised."
"Good point," said Alice in wry tones, sinking back into the leather booth. As she did this, her leg brushed against Helena's and a tingle of desire went through her body at the contact. Smiling nervously, she looked to the British woman who didn't appear to have any reaction to this touch. Providing further proof that winning over Helena both in friendship and romance was going to be as difficult as she thought. "I did a show about it once, you know? The creepiness of old people invading young people dating territory. I decided forty was the cut off age for going to the latest trendy hotspots. But if you had a regular place you visited that was fine. Sort of, I dunno," Alice formed an impish expression. "Grandfathered in or something."
"And The Planet applies quite well for you in that standard," said Helena, a twinkle in her eyes.
"What about you?" asked Alice. "How long have you been coming here?"
A thoughtful look emerged in Helena's gaze and she looked away from Alice, considering what to say when she saw Meredith approach. Reaching into her purse, she peered up at Alice who was still waiting on her reply. "Just a moment, darling," said Helena, her voice holding soft promise. Alice beamed at these admittedly meager words and the British woman nearly winced on seeing this. How had she been treating Alice if she got so excited over such a very small thing? Trying not to think about this, Helena turned to Meredith with a smile. "Back so soon?" she asked, accepting the Bloody Mary from the girl's hand and replacing it with seventeen pounds. "Do keep the change."
"Ah! That there," said Meredith, pointing her finger at Helena playfully. "That is why I always move fast for my favorites." She tucked the money away then said in a grand announcer's voice, "Fullers London Porter." Meredith presented the beer to Alice with great flair, holding it as if it was a precious diamond instead of a bottle filled with malts and hops. Though if you asked Alice, beer was far more precious than diamonds. Particularly in her current situation. "One of my favorites. Tell me how you like it."
"Tell you how I like it," repeated Alice, a grin quirking on her lips. "I'm not sure, that answer can get pretty explicit. Do you really want to know?"
"Cheeky!" Meredith declared with delight.
"I try my best," said Alice, laughing and returning Meredith's wink from earlier.
Laughing merrily, the server leaned down to whisper in Helena's ear who immediately chuckled at whatever she had to say. Then Meredith pulled away, giving Alice a jaunty wave before she left them alone. Helena turned to Alice who wore a face of obvious curiosity and grinned at the sight. "She favors you, darling," Helena said this in blasé tones but her eyes danced with amusement.
"She does, huh?" said Alice, smiling slowly.
"She does," Helena enforced with a nod before taking a slow drink of her Bloody Mary, holding Alice's gaze as she did so.
They remained like that for several moments. Each knowing full well the subtext in Alice's words. It was a silent question, Alice wanting to know if Helena felt the same as Meredith. If she favored Alice as she once had. Holding Helena's gaze steady, Alice swallowed hard then said hushed and hesitant, "Really?"
Helena pulled her attention away from Alice, unable to deal with the want, the need, in those dark eyes. She took a long drink and gathered her courage. Soon, she felt the delicate touch of a hand gently clasping her arm. An unspoken plea for a response, any kind of response.
A thousand memories rushed through her mind, some good, many bad, and in the end Helena only knew one thing. She didn't want to lie to Alice. So she looked to the blonde, smiling sadly when she saw a hint of tears in dark brown eyes and she reached out to lightly cup her cheek. Her smile lit with happiness when Alice sighed in contentment and leaned into her touch.
"Really," whispered Helena, her voice barely audible over the music.
It was an admission, small, yes, but still an admission of Helena's feelings for her and Alice felt overwhelmed by the urge to celebrate. Which is why she took a huge gulp of her beer and turned to the British woman with a giddy look on her face. "Dance?" Alice asked breathlessly.
"What?" Helena blinked.
"Dance with me," said Alice, beaming and already sliding out of the booth. Holding a hand out to Helena who moved towards her without quite knowing why, placing her hand in Alice's. The blonde pulled Helena gently forward and pressed close to murmur in her ear, "I've wanted to dance with you the second I saw you in that dress."
"The very second?" teased Helena. She couldn't help but relax because of the sheer joy Alice was exhibiting simply due to that one little word she had uttered.
"The very second," Alice agreed, giving a solemn nod. An easy confidence had returned to the blonde as she led them through the crowd of women and towards the dance floor with expertise. It was something that had been absent during all of their previous encounters in London and Helena had to admit she did miss it. Although certainly she was the cause for its departure and while she did know this, somehow there was very little she felt she could or wanted to do to correct this. At least as of now. Alice looked over her shoulder, her expression soft and longing as she murmured, "You're so fucking beautiful, Helena. And you don't even realize it."
Allowing Alice to pull her into the warm circle of her arms and swaying to the piano in the song that was playing, Helena lifted an eyebrow and said, "I have been told I'm attractive more than a few times, darling. That being so, I do wonder how you think it is I don't seem to realize it."
"They think your image is beautiful," said Alice, her voice sounding of a restrained anger and definite scorn. "What they've made you into in their own heads. Your looks, your money, your charm. But they don't know the real you." Her hands made a gentle circle on the small of Helena's back, causing the British woman to shiver at her touch. Sensing this, Alice held Helena's gaze and said simply, "They don’t know what really makes you beautiful."
"And you do," said Helena, trying to keep her voice sardonic and light, turning her eyes away from the other woman.
A firm hand reached up to hold Helena's chin, tenderly turning her head until their eyes once again met and looking up with a gaze that was unwavering in its honesty, Alice said, "I do." Then she relaxed her hold and spread her palm flat against Helena's cheek, caressing soft skin as she murmured, "I know I've been out of your life for a long time and I want to change that. I wish I could make up for everything I've done wrong but I don't think I can and I'm not sure you would even let me if I tried." Swallowing hard, Alice looked across the dance floor at all of the happy couples. "I just want," she whispered more to herself to Helena, her sentence trailing off.
"What do you want?" asked Helena, her tone stark and raw in the emotion it held.
Slowly moving her attention back to the British woman, Alice looked up into Helena's eyes and said quietly, "I want another chance with you. I want another chance for us."
The piano continued to play and they moved together as the haunting melody moved into its final chords. Squeezing her eyes shut tight and ducking her head down to hide in the crook of Alice's neck, Helena breathed in the sweet scent of her perfume. She knew what she wanted to do and she knew what it could mean to her. The pain and the insecurity and the worry, oh, the endless worry it would cause. But despite all of this, Helena knew what she wanted and she knew she wanted it so very badly. Her voice cracking ever so slightly, she said, "If I should give you and us this chance. What happens then?"
Releasing a noise of utter happiness, Alice held Helena close to her and clung to her as if she were a dream that would soon disappear. Moving her head down, lips feather light against the British woman's skin, her voice was a throaty whisper, "Then I kiss you."
"I rather like that answer," Helena replied, her tones teary but humorous, pulling away to reveal wet and shining blue eyes.
"Me too," said Alice softly, reaching up to hold Helena's face in her hands. Studying her in great detail before she repeated her words from earlier but this time in a fierce murmur, "So fucking beautiful."
Then she kissed Helena. Long and hard and endless, fingers tangling into curly black hair, tongue sliding into her mouth, and body pressed as close as humanly possible. Alice kissed Helena as if it was the only kiss she would be allowed to give her. Pouring all of her emotions into it, the love she felt for her, the regret over their past, the joy at having this chance again. Everything was in that kiss and Helena did feel it.
Which is why she moaned into Alice and kissed her back ardently. Giving back to the blonde everything she had just received and even a little bit more. Sucking hard on her tongue, pulling away to nibble on her bottom lip, licking the smooth line of her neck, and then moving to adjust the angle of the kiss, causing that one kiss to lead to another and another.
All the while knowing this wasn't the end of their problems but it was a nice start to a possible solution.
To be continued...
TITLE: Time Will Tell
SERIES: The L Word
AUTHOR: Dreiser
EMAIL: dreiser7@yahoo.com
YAHOO ID: dreiser7
MY WEBSITE: http://www.dreiser.net/
CONTENT: S3 spoilers. F/F romance. Alice/Helena. Helacious.
SUMMARY: Even years of separation can't take away the connection between Alice and Helena and the attraction they feel for one another.
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but my undying Helacious love.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: The idea for this fic and the title comes from a spiffy song from Anberlin.
The song they dance to is That's All I Need by Heather Nova which is super sexy but sad. Which is something Heather does so well. But she also does happy and pretty very well so here's another song by her that is precisely that: Singing You Through by Heather Nova.
Time Will Tell
By: Dreiser
Scene Seven
The drive to the club was silent. Mostly because Alice felt the best way to control her impulse to question Helena's driver about her was to simply not to speak to him. Unfortunately, this also meant the drive was horrifically boring.
When they finally reached the club, Alice's hand was on the door and she was exiting the car before it came to a complete stop. "Thanks!" she exclaimed, deciding it was safe to say that much at least. Still, she didn't entirely trust herself and so she called this over her shoulder while bounding forward into the club.
But the moment she stepped inside, Alice found herself motionless as she became entranced by her surroundings. With low tinted lights, luxurious leather lounges, high tables, a long u-shaped bar, and slow sensual music filling the air, this was nothing like any club Alice frequented on a regular basis. Not that she frequented any club other than The Planet since she turned forty. She had declared more than once on the air that anyone over forty involved in the club scene was a sad matter that required an immediate intervention.
This club though, Alice had to admit it suited Helena. It was soothing and rich its atmosphere. Helena fit here.
Alice didn't.
"I thought you would never arrive, darling," Helena murmured in her ear, breath warm on Alice's skin and her voice gently teasing. "Whatever kept you?"
"Your slow driver," replied Alice sardonically, smiling as Helena chuckled at her response. It was nice to see Helena in a better mood or at least an outwardly less hostile one.
"I shall tell him to speed next time," said Helena. She tilted her head and wore a soft look on her features. "Should we sit?"
"Sitting would be good," said Alice, nodding out of sheer nervousness and following after Helena. "I'm feeling a little like Dorothy." When Helena look at her questioningly, Alice laughed and said, "I don't think I'm in West Hollywood anymore!"
Chuckling again, Helena lightly grasped Alice's hand, leading her towards the booth that had somehow become labeled as exclusively hers over the years. Perhaps the fifty percent tips had something to do with it but Helena couldn't be sure. "Ever so clever," she said, sounding pleased to acknowledge this.
"I try," said Alice, still feeling nervous and not quite knowing why.
Perhaps because for the first time since they had become friends the blonde didn't have any idea what Helena was thinking, much less feeling. Something that was terribly disconcerting when she thought of their former bond. That was the thing though. It was former. As in the past and if she was going to get anywhere, Alice had to get beyond her thoughts of how things had been and live in the present. Even if the present wasn't nearly as comfortable as the past.
Focusing ahead, Alice stared at the booth which was shaped in a half circle and had comfortable leather seats that your body easily sank into. Clearly it was designed for intimate encounters and holding this knowledge foremost in her mind, Alice stood unmoving, a picture of trepidation as she looked at it.
Seeing Alice's hesitation, Helena laid a gentle hand to the small of her back, encouraging her forward. "It's all right," her voice, light but reassuring sounded in Alice's ear. "I think it a safe enough venture for us to sit side by side. We aren't virginal teenagers in the fifties so there shant be any arrests for disreputable behavior."
Relaxing immediately, Alice grinned at the British woman and drawled, "Are you promising not to get me in the family way?"
"I rather think that impossible but yes, I do promise," Helena laughed warmly, pulling Alice into the booth after her.
"Rather or impossible?" pursued Alice mischievously.
"Both," pronounced Helena, smiling as she tapped Alice on the tip of her nose. "Scamp."
"Isn't that a character in a Disney movie?" asked Alice, frowning and wiggling her suddenly itchy nose. For some odd reason anytime someone touched her nose it itched afterwards.
"Tramp is the character's name," said Helena, looking at Alice expectantly. When Alice stared at her blankly, Helena shook her head and said, "From Lady and The Tramp?" When Alice continued to stare at her blankly, Helena chuckled then offered sardonically, "Orphaned Romeo & Juliet dogs dining on sympathy spaghetti."
"Ohh!" Alice cried, clapping her hands excitedly. "Dogs kissing," she said, appearing utterly scandalized. "Disney gone naughty."
"I'm sure Hilary Duff is far more responsible for that," replied Helena, smiling as she turned to greet her usual server. "Meredith," Helena drew her name out slow like honey. "How are you this evening?"
"Glad to see you," Meredith said, smiling widely and leaning in closer. She put her hand to the side of her mouth and said in a faux confession to Helena and Alice, "The lady at table three in the strapless red monstrosity will not leave me be. It's driving me mad, honestly it is." Forming an overly lecherous expression and changing her voice, Meredith continued, "You look like you could use a bit of color. Fancy a trip with me to my home in Saint Tropez?" Releasing a disgusted snort, the server stood to her full height and waved her hands about in agitation. "As if I'd jump into her bed and private jet just because I'm lucky enough to get the offer." Shaking her head and pulling her order notebook from her skirt, Meredith muttered, "I despise wealthy women. Large tips do not make me into your slave woman." She peered at Helena, waiting for her order. When Helena raised an eyebrow in amusement, Meredith rolled her eyes and huffed as she waved her notebook about, "Not you! Would I complain to you if I meant you?"
"I should hope not," Helena chuckled.
"You," Meredith announced, pointing her notebook at Helena. "Are the only wealthy customer to not thrust herself upon me. Thus, you are the only one I would surely not mind if she did so." Giving a saucy smile, she drawled, "Was that part of your ingenious plan, Ms. Peabody?"
"Certainly not," said Helena in chiding tones, looking rather like she was scolding one of her children. "I was merely being polite."
"A polite lady does win her way to my heart," mused Meredith, wearing a thoughtful expression. Shaking out of this temporary respite, she then said, "Now whatever will you be imbibing this fine evening?"
"Bloody Mary," said Helena, turning to Alice with a smile. "And you, darling?"
"Beer, please. Any porter will do," said Alice, moving forward and grinning at Meredith. The server's easy attitude with Helena had relaxed the atmosphere greatly and she was extremely grateful to her as a result. "Surprise me."
"Lovely!" Meredith exclaimed, giving Alice a wink. "I adore surprising gorgeous women. It's my favorite pastime."
That said, Meredith turned on her heel and practically skipped over to the bar. Laughing softly, Alice looked to Helena and said, "She's fun."
"She's a horrid flirt," said Helena dryly though her voice was laced with affection. "But she is a terribly sweet girl."
"Girl?" inquired Alice, lifting an eyebrow. Tilting her head to get a better look at the curvaceous Meredith who was laughing gaily at whatever the bartending was saying, Alice wore a skeptical expression. "She looks like a woman to me."
"She is barely twenty one," Helena informed primly. Wagging her index finger side to side and a mischievous light emerging in her eyes, she said, "I consider it wicked indeed to engage in romantic activities with those five years within the age of my children. Not to mention it is substantially ill advised."
"Good point," said Alice in wry tones, sinking back into the leather booth. As she did this, her leg brushed against Helena's and a tingle of desire went through her body at the contact. Smiling nervously, she looked to the British woman who didn't appear to have any reaction to this touch. Providing further proof that winning over Helena both in friendship and romance was going to be as difficult as she thought. "I did a show about it once, you know? The creepiness of old people invading young people dating territory. I decided forty was the cut off age for going to the latest trendy hotspots. But if you had a regular place you visited that was fine. Sort of, I dunno," Alice formed an impish expression. "Grandfathered in or something."
"And The Planet applies quite well for you in that standard," said Helena, a twinkle in her eyes.
"What about you?" asked Alice. "How long have you been coming here?"
A thoughtful look emerged in Helena's gaze and she looked away from Alice, considering what to say when she saw Meredith approach. Reaching into her purse, she peered up at Alice who was still waiting on her reply. "Just a moment, darling," said Helena, her voice holding soft promise. Alice beamed at these admittedly meager words and the British woman nearly winced on seeing this. How had she been treating Alice if she got so excited over such a very small thing? Trying not to think about this, Helena turned to Meredith with a smile. "Back so soon?" she asked, accepting the Bloody Mary from the girl's hand and replacing it with seventeen pounds. "Do keep the change."
"Ah! That there," said Meredith, pointing her finger at Helena playfully. "That is why I always move fast for my favorites." She tucked the money away then said in a grand announcer's voice, "Fullers London Porter." Meredith presented the beer to Alice with great flair, holding it as if it was a precious diamond instead of a bottle filled with malts and hops. Though if you asked Alice, beer was far more precious than diamonds. Particularly in her current situation. "One of my favorites. Tell me how you like it."
"Tell you how I like it," repeated Alice, a grin quirking on her lips. "I'm not sure, that answer can get pretty explicit. Do you really want to know?"
"Cheeky!" Meredith declared with delight.
"I try my best," said Alice, laughing and returning Meredith's wink from earlier.
Laughing merrily, the server leaned down to whisper in Helena's ear who immediately chuckled at whatever she had to say. Then Meredith pulled away, giving Alice a jaunty wave before she left them alone. Helena turned to Alice who wore a face of obvious curiosity and grinned at the sight. "She favors you, darling," Helena said this in blasé tones but her eyes danced with amusement.
"She does, huh?" said Alice, smiling slowly.
"She does," Helena enforced with a nod before taking a slow drink of her Bloody Mary, holding Alice's gaze as she did so.
They remained like that for several moments. Each knowing full well the subtext in Alice's words. It was a silent question, Alice wanting to know if Helena felt the same as Meredith. If she favored Alice as she once had. Holding Helena's gaze steady, Alice swallowed hard then said hushed and hesitant, "Really?"
Helena pulled her attention away from Alice, unable to deal with the want, the need, in those dark eyes. She took a long drink and gathered her courage. Soon, she felt the delicate touch of a hand gently clasping her arm. An unspoken plea for a response, any kind of response.
A thousand memories rushed through her mind, some good, many bad, and in the end Helena only knew one thing. She didn't want to lie to Alice. So she looked to the blonde, smiling sadly when she saw a hint of tears in dark brown eyes and she reached out to lightly cup her cheek. Her smile lit with happiness when Alice sighed in contentment and leaned into her touch.
"Really," whispered Helena, her voice barely audible over the music.
It was an admission, small, yes, but still an admission of Helena's feelings for her and Alice felt overwhelmed by the urge to celebrate. Which is why she took a huge gulp of her beer and turned to the British woman with a giddy look on her face. "Dance?" Alice asked breathlessly.
"What?" Helena blinked.
"Dance with me," said Alice, beaming and already sliding out of the booth. Holding a hand out to Helena who moved towards her without quite knowing why, placing her hand in Alice's. The blonde pulled Helena gently forward and pressed close to murmur in her ear, "I've wanted to dance with you the second I saw you in that dress."
"The very second?" teased Helena. She couldn't help but relax because of the sheer joy Alice was exhibiting simply due to that one little word she had uttered.
"The very second," Alice agreed, giving a solemn nod. An easy confidence had returned to the blonde as she led them through the crowd of women and towards the dance floor with expertise. It was something that had been absent during all of their previous encounters in London and Helena had to admit she did miss it. Although certainly she was the cause for its departure and while she did know this, somehow there was very little she felt she could or wanted to do to correct this. At least as of now. Alice looked over her shoulder, her expression soft and longing as she murmured, "You're so fucking beautiful, Helena. And you don't even realize it."
Allowing Alice to pull her into the warm circle of her arms and swaying to the piano in the song that was playing, Helena lifted an eyebrow and said, "I have been told I'm attractive more than a few times, darling. That being so, I do wonder how you think it is I don't seem to realize it."
"They think your image is beautiful," said Alice, her voice sounding of a restrained anger and definite scorn. "What they've made you into in their own heads. Your looks, your money, your charm. But they don't know the real you." Her hands made a gentle circle on the small of Helena's back, causing the British woman to shiver at her touch. Sensing this, Alice held Helena's gaze and said simply, "They don’t know what really makes you beautiful."
"And you do," said Helena, trying to keep her voice sardonic and light, turning her eyes away from the other woman.
A firm hand reached up to hold Helena's chin, tenderly turning her head until their eyes once again met and looking up with a gaze that was unwavering in its honesty, Alice said, "I do." Then she relaxed her hold and spread her palm flat against Helena's cheek, caressing soft skin as she murmured, "I know I've been out of your life for a long time and I want to change that. I wish I could make up for everything I've done wrong but I don't think I can and I'm not sure you would even let me if I tried." Swallowing hard, Alice looked across the dance floor at all of the happy couples. "I just want," she whispered more to herself to Helena, her sentence trailing off.
"What do you want?" asked Helena, her tone stark and raw in the emotion it held.
Slowly moving her attention back to the British woman, Alice looked up into Helena's eyes and said quietly, "I want another chance with you. I want another chance for us."
The piano continued to play and they moved together as the haunting melody moved into its final chords. Squeezing her eyes shut tight and ducking her head down to hide in the crook of Alice's neck, Helena breathed in the sweet scent of her perfume. She knew what she wanted to do and she knew what it could mean to her. The pain and the insecurity and the worry, oh, the endless worry it would cause. But despite all of this, Helena knew what she wanted and she knew she wanted it so very badly. Her voice cracking ever so slightly, she said, "If I should give you and us this chance. What happens then?"
Releasing a noise of utter happiness, Alice held Helena close to her and clung to her as if she were a dream that would soon disappear. Moving her head down, lips feather light against the British woman's skin, her voice was a throaty whisper, "Then I kiss you."
"I rather like that answer," Helena replied, her tones teary but humorous, pulling away to reveal wet and shining blue eyes.
"Me too," said Alice softly, reaching up to hold Helena's face in her hands. Studying her in great detail before she repeated her words from earlier but this time in a fierce murmur, "So fucking beautiful."
Then she kissed Helena. Long and hard and endless, fingers tangling into curly black hair, tongue sliding into her mouth, and body pressed as close as humanly possible. Alice kissed Helena as if it was the only kiss she would be allowed to give her. Pouring all of her emotions into it, the love she felt for her, the regret over their past, the joy at having this chance again. Everything was in that kiss and Helena did feel it.
Which is why she moaned into Alice and kissed her back ardently. Giving back to the blonde everything she had just received and even a little bit more. Sucking hard on her tongue, pulling away to nibble on her bottom lip, licking the smooth line of her neck, and then moving to adjust the angle of the kiss, causing that one kiss to lead to another and another.
All the while knowing this wasn't the end of their problems but it was a nice start to a possible solution.
To be continued...
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